19 Jan The BEST Self-Leadership Advice I Can Give You

Last night I got news from a women I mentored and her story is the BEST self-leadership advice I can give you.

A few months back her and I met for our session. We grabbed lunch, she talked about her situation and what was happening at work. I could tell she was a powerhouse in her profession because of her title, dedication and drive to help other women.

Her story is like so many though….she was waiting. 

Waiting for things to change for her. Waiting for her husband and her to get on the same page. Waiting for her boss to recognize her true potential. Waiting for the executives to actually pay attention to what she was accomplishing. Waiting for bigger insight into what she “should” be doing with her life.

Waiting, waiting, waiting….

All this waiting is what I call Waiting in Permission.

I have seen this happen to some of the greatest people. They have tremendous amounts of potential but somewhere inside them they need that exterior permission from someone who sees them, hears them and believes in them.

And the problem is, if we all waited for that to happen, we may all miss our calling. 

Through out our lunch I could tell she was completely perplexed about our conversation. She wanted a checklist of what to do and how to do it. She wanted me to tell her how I broke the bonds of my old corporate life and begin a business I am blessed to have. She wanted me to give her the key to happiness.

What I gave her is the best self-leadership advice that I can give anyone: You have to give yourself permission first.

That’s it.

You have to be willing to give yourself permission to find out who you truly are, what you truly value and what you truly are meant to be doing. If you can’t find the strength to do that, you will continually be waiting for someone else to tell you.

I have been here before. I have been here actually too many times. I wait and wait and wait. When I finally wake up to the power of my own permission, I am able to do things more rapidly than before. I see more clearly, I accomplish more and I am happier.

Last night her story gave me goosebumps. 

She gave herself permission. She discovered her values and talked it over with her husband which in turn made him question his values. They both agreed on some pretty amazing things that will allow them both to purse their dream life. She found her voice at work and finally asked for what she needed so that she can spend more time on her bigger passion project. She is happier. Her kids are happier. Her marriage is happier.

She still has a long road ahead but its an incredible start that I am so excited to share with you.

When we pursue our own self-leadership, we expand in ways unimaginable.

For all of you waiting in permission, I task with you starting small. Where can you find the courage to grant yourself permission? And this doesn’t mean permission to eat more, drink more, or be destructive. This permission is about building your self-belief muscles and truly believe in the power of you.

And as always, I am here. The permission I have given myself is to be here for you, to push you, to guide you and to encourage the hell out of you.